"Waiting on a Miracle"

It is in the little things that I see God most at work, and just stand back in awe at what He is doing and how He takes care of me and assures me that He will continue to take care of me. This semester has been a rough one, and it’s just barely started, but it is these difficulties that have so helped my faith to grow, and I can definitely see that God is stretching me and using these circumstances to prepare me for the future He has for me that only He can see. Every day I learn to depend on God more and more, and not on myself. In January, I started a personal quiet time Bible Study on Genesis, and at the time I didn’t realize how providential that would be, that I would be doing this Bible Study at the exact time that I needed it most. Funny thing is, Parkwood Baptist Church, my home Church in North Carolina, that I attend while I’m in school, also started a chronological Bible Study in January, and the first couple weeks matched right up with where I was at in Genesis in my personal Bible Study. I so needed to be reminded of these lessons from Abraham’s life during this semester. I knew going in to this semester that I was going to owe money to Gardner Webb University (GWU) for school, and that I didn’t have that money, but I also knew that God had called me here and I know that He will provide, even if I can’t see how. Since I knew that I was going to owe money this semester, I was busy over Christmas break and even in to the beginning of the semester applying for every scholarship I could find to apply for, and also every job I could find, because I had never gotten a job in the previous Fall semester and over break it was looking like I wasn’t going to have one for this Spring either. But God was faithful, and my first week back at GWU I interviewed for a job on campus and I got it! I was so excited! This was definitely an assurance that I needed that I was where God wanted me, even if right now things have still not worked out for my tuition. I think this job is also a perfect job for me, because it is a fundraising job and since I plan on going into full time service overseas when I graduate, I think this job will help to teach me a lot of skills that I will need in the future. I am amazed at how God provided this job at the perfect time. 

January 15, was when I was supposed to make the first payment towards my tuition for this semester, but I didn’t have the money to pay it. So I went into the business office and explained the situation, and told them I had gotten a job on campus and that I planned on using all the money from that to go towards my bill, so they postponed the day to make that first payment until January 31. I am so thankful for how kind and understanding and patient the business office is here at GWU. At the same time I was learning in my personal Bible Study and in the Sunday night Bible Study’s at Parkwood, about Abraham and how God kept His promise to Abraham, but it was a long time before Abraham saw the fulfillment of that promise, yet Abraham kept believing. I truly believed that God was going to do something miraculous between January 15 and January 31 to provide for my financial needs for school. I really prayed about if there was anything else I needed to do during that waiting time, because I believe that faith requires action, and even though we wait on God and trust Him to provide, sometimes God requires us to do things as well. But I felt like I just needed to wait on God. So I did, and at the same time God kept confirming for me in many different little ways that this is where He wants me. Like how perfectly everything was working out at GWU for my classes and my job, and how everything was working out with my internship at Parkwood, and all that I was learning from these that was preparing me for my future. I am learning so much from my classes, my job and my internship that I know will help me in the future. I was also reading in my personal Bible study about Abraham, Sarah, and Hagar, and learning that we should not take matters into our own hands and try to fulfill God’s promises on our own when it seems like God is not going to keep His promises and we think that we have to do something to make what God promised happen. But God’s ways our not the same as ours, and His timing is not the same as ours, and when it seems like He’s not keeping His promise it’s just because His plan is greater than we can see and He will work things out in the way that is best according to His timing. I am also currently reading a book called “Kisses from Katie” about a college student who went to work in Uganda for a year, and ended up staying there, and she shared many stories of God’s provision, and I knew that God was showing me that He would provide for my needs to, I just had to wait on Him to do it in His timing and His way. God was also speaking to me through other various sermons and messages I heard during this time, to assure me that He was going to provide for me and take care of my needs. 

Tuesday, January 29, I went to dimensions, what GWU calls their chapel services, and the guest speaker that day shared a story about God’s provision, and once again I knew that God was assuring me He would take care of my needs, and I really believed somehow God was going to make a way for me to make my payment on January 31. I knew I certainly had no way of paying it, although I had started a job on campus, I had only been paid for one week of work at the time and I had applied that paycheck to my bill, but it only put a small dent in what I owed. I was also getting reimbursed some for my internship at Parkwood, mostly to cover gas, but I would have some left over after paying for gas, however, I had not gotten my first paycheck for my internship yet, and I felt like God was saying that He wanted me to fully rely on Him to make the payment for school. So January 31 came, and I went to my first class at 8:00. All day I was nervous about how everything was going to work out. I went to dimensions again, and one of the songs that was sung really spoke to me and gave me peace about my financial situation. So at 2:30, when I was finally finished with classes and would have to do something to take care of my bill, I really believed that God was going to take care of it. I checked my email and my mail, but there was nothing, and I was disappointed. I went to the business office, and again explained the situation, and I told them that I had applied for a bunch of scholarships over Christmas break and the winners of at least two of those were to be announced on February 1, and that hopefully I would win one of them so I could pay my bill. So they said they would postpone January’s payment until the end of February when my second payment was due, and I could just pay both at the same time. When I walked out of that business office I felt an overwhelming sense of peace that God was going to take care of my needs. And I thought that one of those scholarships would work out. That same day God used His creation to speak to me and assure me that He would take care of my needs. I saw a rainbow three different times that day, and as I saw those rainbows I was reminded of how God kept His promise to Noah to never again flood the whole world. Thursday night I went to the Verge, a Bible study/worship service they have at GWU, and during the service God revealed to me that He wanted me to learn to trust Him even when the things that I thought would happen a certain way did not happen. Even when the things that I thought would work out to pay for my school bill, the things that seemed to me to be the only way for me to make the payments for school, did not work out, He still wanted me to trust Him, that He would take care of it even though I had no idea how. I thought that just pertained to things not working out on January 31, but I guess He was trying to prepare me for what was going to happen on February 1 too. 

So I got up February 1, and went to my only class that day, and throughout the day I kept checking to see if the winners of the two scholarships I had applied for had been announced yet, and I fully believed that I would win one of them. Well the winners were announced and I didn’t win. I really struggled with that at first, and I just didn’t understand. But after spending some quiet time with God, He gave me peace again, and once again showed me that He wanted me to stop doing and trying to make things work out and just trust Him and wait on Him to take care of it. He has used many other things since then to confirm for me that this is where He wants me and that He will provide for my needs, such as kindness and encouraging words from people, letters from my Compassion child, and people blessing me. I know that He is going to provide, I just don’t know how or when, but I know He wants me to depend on Him and not on myself. So here I am with nothing else that I can do to make things work out for my tuition. I’ve done all I can, and it all failed, so now all I can do is fully depend on Him and wait on Him to work it out. Here I am, still waiting on a miracle. http://matthewwest.com/the-stories/the-story-waiting-on-a-miracle/